Read the title. It's not just a title. It's the future.
I practically haven't started studying.
I've been busy doing :
1. Training for grading. And I failed. Bummer. Oh well.
2. Notice board Carta Organisasi. Done.
3. Chess competition. This sunday.
4. Demo. Next saturday. Actually haven't started anything yet. I'm so dead.
Ah failed my grading. Sensei said we will still remain as brown belts. But does it mean anything if you hold a brown belt but failed the test??
Anyways I'm not sad or anything. Dissapointed? of course. It's EXACTLY the same feeling when I didn't get a place in a chess tournament. So in other words, I've gotten used to it. It's like the feeling where you don't plan to gain anything but until the result came out, there's still this slim but significant hope. And after that you realise that how unnessecary and useless it is to hope.
Later I asked Sensei when is the next grading. LOL he said 'Whenever you're ready * Pat on the shoulder *' It's like a typical thing that a sensei would do. Like when you ask ' How do I get good?' All those great masters tend to give sensei-ish answers like ' You shall seek wisdom that exist in knowing that you know nothing...' instead of just ' practice hard lah.. ' Oh well. Beter try next time.
And I'm going to enjoy this feeling again this Sunday. Hm.. at least someone would share it with me. LOL.
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